Hey Psst You reading my book? Uhh Yeah, why? Hey, you know Hagrid? Uhh, yeah? He’s actually transgender What? Yeah, he used to used to go by Hergrid but he’s – but now he’s – but he’s transgender Okay… HERMIONE’S IN A WHEELCHAIR! What are you saying? Hermione Granger? Yeah, she’s actually …um… in a wheelchair the whole time No she wasn’t! I remember multiple scenes where she was running around, and you never mentioned a wheelchair once Well I just forgot to write it down! But I meant it in my heart.. How could you forget a detail like that? Hey! Don’t blame me! Do you even know how many things I had to remember for those books? Like, you know how many spells I had to write? Like so many! I can’t remember everything Um, I don’t know Ron was actually black! You said he had red hair! Harry Potter had Down Syndrome! What? What does that even mean? Professor Snape was a single mother! Alright, stop! Stop! Why are you doing this? Doing what? Listen, it would be fine if the characters were like this originally But it seems like you’re changing them after the fact so you can seem more inclusive and get good press Oh… um Ok, I’m sorry, I’ll stop… Okay Thank you. Wait, just one more thing? What is it? Guess – um… Guess which character’s actually gay? What? I said “Guess which character’s actually gay?” I don’t know… um – All of them!